Dear Ma,

          I don’t know what’s going on. Why aren’t you talking to me? What happened? I need you now. Tita Flor isn’t communicating with me, too, for the reasons I fcuking don’t know. I miss her. I miss you! Talk to me. 

           Ma, I know it’s your birthday tomorrow and in my 21 years in this world, I never did something extraordinary to make you feel loved especially on your birthday. I did text you“I Love You” 3 times. Yes, in 21 years, 3 times. :| I am sorry.

           I know that you saw me as your failure before and that changed. But now, I feel like I am. I am such a failure. I didn’t commit a lot of mistakes. In fact, I did litlle things and that’s why I think I am such a big failure. I don’t do things. I am afraid to commit mistakes. And just when I see myself as such, you look at me as the most beautiful person. How ironic.

          I don’t say “I love you” because..because..I don’t know. I feel more than those words could expound. I accepted you for who you are though you don’t feel the same way before. In my 21 years, I live with with the hope that I will have a “mother” in you someday and I did.

           I feel uneasy at the moment. I think I am a loser for not being there beside you on your birthday. But I tell you this, I may fail in many things. I may lose in many battles. And here, I will never fail to love you. I will never lose faith in you.

          I love you.

Your daughter,
Hazel