Colors of Life

         I am sick, literally and figuratively. I don’t know why such damn shits happen to me. I’m happy. Who said that sick people can’t be? It’s been a while when sadness just covered up the whole me. A long while.          I told myself that I would never let myself be stranded. And here I am, walking. I know time will come when I got nothing to do but to smile. That the world of dreams would be the reality I am about to live. That I can live life with less worries. It takes time and I have to adjust to it. There are 24 hours a day, I can’t change that so I’ll change for me not be left on the same location.          Healing is just coming to me slowly. I won’t forget all those things - the tears, the pain and the lessons. But I know I can accept everything. My downfalls are just downfalls. There’s no signboard that says “you have no right to stand up”. I know a lot of people love me.         Loss of one person does not mean loss of his/her love. I can smile again. I have not moved on but I am taking step. I cry often but I manage to smile after the tears. I’m a lot better now.         Fucking challenges can’t beat me. I was a loser maybe.. but I am coming back to face the world. I just had to lose to gain strength. I’m stronger now I think. If not, surely, I’m better.         If I fail, I’ll learn. If I win, jackpot. You just have to torture yourself to feel the pain so that in the future, you can tolerate it. Whoa, my momsy is surely happy that I grew up this way. (yabang) Nah, just trying to convince myself. hahaha.         I will live one day at a time but still wait for bonuses. I will chase after life and happiness will chase after me.. hahaha.         I just love this feeling, the feeling of realizations. Meron ba nun? Abno. Basta. I‘ll be better every step of the way. Sarap mabuhay. Iyak. Ngiti. Tawa. Lungkot. See, that’s how colorful life is. Colors are not just composed of bright ones, there are also dark sides. I have both. =)